Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The Loss of a Friend

I lost a dear friend today. So unexpected. I’m still in shock as I know all her family and friends are. I feel the emptiness that her death leaves me with. She was a true friend, the type of friend that we could share any personal thing with the other, and we each understood.

We first met in 1992, and then in 1996 she moved to Sedona where I was living and our friendship grew closer—and then we both, at about the same time, moved back to California eight years ago, and live a few miles apart.

We emotionally supported each other through difficult times--and good times. She often worked for me reading and edited my manuscripts while in process—and did things around my office when it was difficult for me.

She loved, loved, animals and would be happy when she would see a dog or two being walked by their owner. We loved going out for Mexican food. We would cry together when we listened to Susan Boyle sing.

A couple of months ago, she had to put her dog to sleep and just two days ago, her cat. Two days before that we had talked about it being time to put the cat to sleep, something that should have been done before. You know how it is, we hang onto our pets, often much longer than we should. I told her, like my cat, Snickers who I lost last fall, her cat was also telling her it was time to go. She said she knew it was, and would do it on Saturday. She said she was also looking forward to being free. No animals to care for. My thought was that would not last long as she would probably have another before too long.

Tuesday she died. And now she is free.

Too young, with still so much love to give and life to live.

I will miss Anne so much.


A friendship
is a special, unique state of being-
an entity readily identified
without resort to vows, spiritual or intellectual,
and without recourse to sacraments,
dispensations, or decrees...
A friendship is a private thing.

A friendship is not a casual thing-
nor, indeed, is it a thing at all:
it is an essence-a source of things-
yet more than an idea, much more
than a suggestion,
and nothing at all like an inspiration;
a friendship is simply a movement, and a meeting,
and a recognition within pure spirit.

A friendship is a romance without flesh-
a love affair with no affair-
a blending of the best that we may offer
one another:
it does not demand, it does not fulfill,
and it does not sustain the members...
But it is there, silent and unassuming,
happy and understanding, always ready
for instant use;
and it need not be fed, requires no special shelter,
and is big enough to stretch across any distance.

So, say not farewell to me, my friends:
farewell is a strange word, spoken in an alien
and having no meaning in the framework
of the feelings we share together.

Say, instead: let’s meet again.
~Don Pendleton (1927-1995)

© Copyright 2011 Linda Pendleton


Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. A dear friend is a priceless treasure, and losing one is like losing part of your soul.

But, she is free. And you will meet her again - I believe that with all my heart.

Linda Pendleton said...

Thank you, Jeff--I know how well you understand.